There’s no need for me to talk about 2020 and how much of a dumpster fire it was. We all experienced it and hopefully came out relatively unscathed on the other side. But for all of the things that went wrong and sucked, there were oh so many that went right. For me, I enjoyed getting to spend some extra time in our old house before we sold it, as well as spending the extra time with Nick and Sebastian as we worked and learned from home, and creating our new traditions while making the best of crappy situations.

In November, I started a daily practice of gratitude that I’ve worked to continue into this new year.  Then a colleague & friend of mine on Facebook gave me the wonderful idea for this blog post: She posted one photo from each month of 2020 that captured joy and I wanted to do this same.

And honestly, the best part of this little project was realizing how hard it was to pick just ONE photo!

I’m so grateful that I had so many happy moments that I can cherish and remember when I look back on one the worst years ever.

So, here are my best parts of 2020.

I’ve concluded the final week of practicing gratitude every day this month for National Gratitude Month.

Here’s what I was thankful for:

Day 22: I’m thankful for podcasts. It took me a while to jump onto the bandwagon but now it’s one of my favorite forms of entertainment. I’m realizing I mostly like podcasts that teach me something, but I’m grateful for the variety that’s out there.

Day 23: I’m thankful for candles. Here lately I’ve been lighting a scented candle in my office while I work. The warmth of the flame and the sweet smell of “autumn wreath” have had a very uplifting effect on my mood. I’m grateful for something so simple.

Day 24: I’m thankful for therapy and Xanax. I have a wonderful therapist who does a great job of validating my feelings while helping me to reframe my negative thoughts. Sometimes I just need someone to whom I can unload all of my stress and anxiety, and she helps me figure out how to make it more manageable. And on the days when it is simply too much to handle and none of the reframing, meditation, or grounding works, I can turn to the medication to calm my racing thoughts and pounding heart. I’ll never be ashamed of getting help when and where I need it, and I hope that in sharing my experiences, others will seek help without fear or shame. For this, I am grateful.

I’ve concluded the yet another week of practicing gratitude every day this month for National Gratitude Month.

Here’s what I was thankful for:

Day 15: In light of all that we’ve been through this year, I’m grateful that I’m still able to find joy where I can. For example, normally I’m one of those people who believes we absolutely should wait until one holiday passes before we celebrate the next. Thanksgiving first and then Christmas. But this year, we’ve thrown it all to the wind and it’s so much fun to do what we want! I decorated for Halloween at the end of August and we put up our Christmas tree on Sunday. While we haven’t fully decorated our tree yet, it does have lights and those lights make me extremely happy, filling me with cheer and hope even as the days get shorter and the nights get colder and the coronavirus cases spike again. We may just leave this tree up for all of 2021.

Day 16:  I’m thankful that sometimes things aren’t always as bad as they may initially seem. When you suffer from anxiety, there’s a tendency to always overthink and misread. Luckily, things often work out just fine despite our worst fears, and I’m very grateful for that. Last month I made a very tough–and honestly, stupid–decision to leave my current job at the end of the month to pursue something I’m more passionate about. I’ve been miserable at work for a while now (what else is new?) and it has been affecting my physical and mental health. I don’t have anything concrete lined up yet but a few things are in the works so I have hope and am thankful that I’m able to take this huge leap right now at a time when everything is so uncertain.

Day 17: I’m grateful for tummy tickles and blissful laughter at bedtime. Parenting is hard. Being a 3.5 year old with big feelings and little control over them is hard. So when we get a chance to just play and laugh, we take it even if delays bedtime. Tonight, after reading our bedtime stories, I laid in Sebastian’s bed with him and tickled him while he laughed and just enjoyed the time I get to spend with him. He’s growing up so fast so I’m incredibly thankful for these little moments.

I’ve concluded the second week of practicing gratitude every day this month for National Gratitude Month.

Here’s what I was thankful for:

Day 8: I’m thankful for my dogs. Y’all know how much I love these puppers, and even though we’ve had a rough time training Milo (and we still have a ways to go), they still bring me so much joy. I love how they keep me company in my office while I work during the days and cuddle on the couch in evenings while we’re watching TV. They help make my heart feel full.

Day 9: I’m thankful for the cheesy Christmas movies that are always playing this time of year. They’re always so positive and predictable, but that’s what I love about them; sometimes it’s exactly what my anxious mind needs. I’m grateful that on days like today, when things start to feel like they’re just a little too much, I can get lost in a fictional winter wonderland. Btw, Hallmark has the best ones but without cable I’m making due with those on Amazon and Netflix!

Day 10: I’m thankful for the opportunity to always learn new things, even if it’s stuff I have very little interest in or feel like I’ll never use in “real life.” There’s a world full of knowledge out there and getting to access even a fraction of it over a lifetime is pretty cool.

I talked earlier about how gratitude is so good for every single one of us. I haven’t done a great job this year of staying positive and want to use National Gratitude Month to get into the habit of practicing gratitude on a daily basis. So here are the things I was grateful for this week:

Day 1: I’m grateful for the rain. Sometimes the rain feels right, even though it can be very dreary and it often keeps you stuck indoors. Without the rainy days, however, there would be no plants, no muddy puddles to splash in, and little appreciation for the sun. The next time you find yourself stuck in a downpour simply lift your head to sky, feel the drops landing on your nose, and try to appreciate the nature of life.

Day 2: I’m thankful for nachos for dinner. After a long day of work, laundry, and other errands, I decided to make cheesy chicken nachos for dinner. They were quick, easy, and delicious! They may not have been super healthy but it’s all about balance and letting yourself have a little fun. It’s also really simple: just buy all the ingredients you need from the store (I used  tortilla chips, already-cooked grilled chicken strips chopped into bite-sized pieces, black beans, black olives, shredded cheddar and pepper jack cheeses, jarred jalapeños, guacamole, and salsa), layer them up and bake them in the oven for a bit until the cheese is nice and melty. Yum!